Forgiveness is the central message of Christianity … Jesus came … suffered and died on a cross so our sins could be washed away. Jesus appeared to Karen in a vision and she experienced the amazing power of His love and His ability to forgive. Jesus also gave Karen the heart of compassion she needed to forgive others …
Drawn to know Him better
I had not been to church for many years, though I was a believer in Jesus, and I loved Him. Suddenly I felt like He was calling me to know him better. I started reading other people's testimonies about Jesus. I read life stories of people who had near-death experiences and actually went to Heaven and met Jesus. The more I read, the closer I felt to Him. I met a new friend who invited me to church. I said, yes, anything that would draw me closer to Him.
Confronting my lack of forgiveness
As I sat in church, the minister asked the question, "What is the mountain in your life?" He told us to take a few minutes to meditate about it. I thought about things I had not been able to overcome in my life. My biggest mountain was definitely the lack of forgiveness I felt for people who I thought had wronged me or who had hurt me in some way. I could easily walk out of people's lives, and hold a grudge for 20 years or the rest of my life for that matter. As I thought about these things, I felt a deep wrenching pain in my heart, even physical pain, as though my heart was being squeezed tight in my chest.
Surprised by the face of Jesus!
I bowed my head. I knew what the bible said about forgiveness, and I thought, Jesus is probably mad at me. If I did see him, I was sure He would come condemning me. As I was thinking I should look for his face, I raised my eyes, and couldn't have been more surprised that He was actually there … in that room! Jesus was wearing a crown of thorns, and smiling at me with the most loving smile I had ever seen.
Overwhelming love
I felt no condemnation from Him at all and that surprised me. Next, I felt him sending me love that was full of compassion. It was an overwhelming kind of love that I was sure human beings aren't capable of. I was in awe that Jesus could love me that much. It was blissful. I was totally absorbed by that love to the point where I felt my heart could burst. I have never felt anything like it, and I'm sure that I never will as long as I'm on this Earth. I just continued to gaze up at Him, and He continued to smile at me. Throughout the whole vision, Jesus never once stopped smiling at me.
Jesus already knew about my life
Next, I saw Him sending beams of transparent, white light towards my heart. I felt the light penetrating my being. The light was nothing but love, and compassion … no condemnation. Then Jesus began to communicate with me by feelings. Jesus said that He already knew all about me, about my lack of forgiveness towards others … how other people had hurt me. He said, "I know everything about you." That surprised me greatly, but I also felt comforted by it.
Jesus says, "Come to me all you who are heavily laden …"
It meant that Jesus had never been far from me, like I had always thought, but I had been constantly under His supervision. Again, I felt more compassion pouring out from Him to me. He said, "I feel your pain. I grieve with you." He was like a loving parent who picks you up when you are hurting, and holds you in their loving arms. Jesus will comfort you, and wipe away all of your tears. I felt like I had been comforted, and held in the arms of Jesus. After He lovingly comforted me, He spoke again. Jesus told me not to worry about these things because He would take care of it. I felt a burden had been lifted, and I felt like it was easy for Him to take care of my burdens. I sensed that it was no problem at all for Him.
Exposing my sinfulness
I was still looking at Him, still surprised by some of the things that He said. Jesus still wore that loving smile on His face … a smile that would melt the heart of the most hardened sinner. There was so much love that I felt like my heart couldn't hold it all, and it may burst. I felt like I couldn't handle it any more. Seeing all of the goodness and purity in Him, I felt like I may break down and sob. I started to feel unworthy when I compared myself to His pure holiness. I became aware of even my smallest sins. I felt unworthy of Him, and then I looked away. When I looked back, he wasn't there anymore, but I was left with a feeling of total awe. Jesus had been there, I had seen Him, I had felt Him, He had communicated with me, and I knew that He loved me more than anyone had ever loved me in my life!
God so loved the world …
Jesus blessed me with a vision and I knew He still loved me unconditionally, in spite of my flaws. I thought to myself, how could this be? Later that night I started to read the bible in the Gospel of John and Jesus answered my question clearly.
"For God so loved the world that he gave his only begotten son, that whosoever believes in him should not perish, but have everlasting life. For God didn't send his son into the world to condemn the world, but that the world through him might be saved. He that believes on him is not condemned, but he that does not believe is already condemned because he has not believed" (John 3:16-18).
Shown how to forgive
I had sought to know Him with my whole heart and soul. I remembered that He had worn the crown of thorns in my vision. I now realize that they were meant to be symbolic, a reminder to me of how He loved us all enough to be lifted up, and crucified on the cross for the forgiveness of our sins. The crown of thorns is a symbol of His love that He feels for each one of us. He had truly shown me how to forgive.
Karen
Jesus said, "Father forgive them, for they do not know what they are going" (Luke 23:34).
Beaten, spat on, and scorned,
Those were the reasons He was born,
Redemption for all mankind …
He was a healer, and leader to the blind.
He carried the burden for us all.
Though He was pure in spirit,
Still He would take the fall.
He walked willingly to His slaughter
To bring salvation to His sons and daughters.
He stood alone in silence,
And for Himself He gave no defence,
For that was the reason He was sent.
He would take all of the blame,
For that was the reason He came.
The shepherd was struck, and the sheep did scatter.
Peace, and safety, and dreams were shattered.
A heavy burden for one man's shoulders.
He was but one man,
But He was a mighty soldier.
A redeemer to the human race.
Oh, how I appreciate His grace.
He was crucified on the cross
So that our souls were not lost.
I continually thank the Lord above
For showing us that much love.
